"We are so thankful to Family Caregivers for the help they provided at such a difficult time. We could not have done it without them." Niven family
The American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy states that “more than ever
before, families are providing long-term care to older adults with limitations
in the ability to perform tasks necessary for independent living. Nearly 25% of
American households are providing care to people age 50 years and over.
Families are the alternative foundation for a stressed healthcare system.
Hospital stays are shorter than ever and family caregivers are often expected
to do what healthcare professionals once did.”
Family caregivers take over various responsibilities for
their elders. It may be just handling
finances, running errands, going to doctor appointments or taking on full 24
hour care services. In most cases one
sibling in the family will become the main caregiver, but most successful
ventures are supported by the entire family.
There is a saying that it takes a village to raise a
child. This may be true, but it takes a
family to care for an aging parent. As
seniors lose physical and cognitive function they become vulnerable and unable
to manage their own care. Who better to
know their needs and desires than their own children. Even if professional care givers are providing
services, family involvement makes the difference in quality of life for their
parents.
“If one family member has been designated caregiver other members
can give support with respite care, transportation to doctors, etc., everyone
needs to be aware of all that is needed and be in total agreement to do it”. “The 4 Steps of LongTerm Care Planning”
Experience has shown that even families that are close can
quickly grow angry, jealous and hostile towards each other when an aging parent
begins to need long term care. If a sibling moves into the parent’s home,
others can easily be suspicious of ulterior motives and fear to lose their
inheritance. On the other hand, the child doing the entire care taking becomes
bitter and feels there is no support or help from siblings.
One example of a
family misunderstanding is that of a brother accusing his sister of stealing
all of the money from the sale of his parent’s home.
Karen, who was a single mom with two children, moved in
with her parents when her father had a stroke to help her mother take care of
him. Her mother was also disabled. Needing money to pay for a home care
service, Karen helped her mother do a reverse mortgage on the home, which gave
the needed funds. If communication had been open and Karen’s brother had known
the need and been involved with his parents care, he would not have reacted so
negatively when he eventually found out about the reverse mortgage.
Every family is different. Some families are close and some
have never been compatible. If your communication is strained, consider having
a professional
mediator such as a Geriatric Care Manager or Professional Patient Care Advocate present at a family meeting. The mediator will be able to keep
things calm and running smoothly and help work out each persons concern.
Family matters. The
experience of working together for their parents care can give aging parents
and family members a peaceful, memorable experience. Call Family Caregivers Network 215-541-9030 or visit www.familycaregiversnetwork.com for more information or to schedule a visit by a Geriatric Care Manager or Professional Patient Advocate.
Article compliments of The National Care Planning Council which Family Caregivers Network is a member of. Multiple resource information available at Long Term Care Link.
