Caregiver Support Groups, can they really help the Caregiver?

by Gerry Fioriglio RN, BS Geriatric Care Manager

Thank you for visiting our blog and reading our posts.  The last post was an article written by Byron Pulsifer about how to take care of  the caregiver.  At Family Caregivers Network we hold monthly caregiver support groups for anyone who is a caregiver.  Whether you provide direct care or are indirectly involved in the care of someone you are a caregiver. Often caregivers are intimidated by support groups.  They are afraid to share their story.  Many caregivers believe they are managing their role and don't need to discuss their situation with other caregivers.  Yet when they attend a meeting caregivers find they identify with the stories of other caregivers.  At Family Caregivers we believe that by sharing your story you can help others as well as yourself.  You just need to let down your guard.  This is easier for women than for men.  Men don't easily share their emotions which can cause them to have "caregiver burnout" at a much higher rate than women.  In the past 10 years of facilitating caregiver support groups only a handful of men have attended our groups.  Yet those who have attended our support groups found the support and fellowship needed to be a stronger caregiver.  To learn more about caregiver support groups and how to take care of the caregiver tune in to PCTV "What's Happening" online Thursday, August 5th at 12:00 pm.  Go to website, http://www.deneliott.com/ and click on the video for "What's Happening"  Live call in questions will be taken during the show.   You can also view the show on Pottstown Comcast Cable Channel 28 or 22.  Join us, I look forward to your comments.   I can be reached at gfioriglio@family-caregivers.com anytime for questions about caregiving. 

Caring About A Care Giver in Allentown, PA

Caring About A Care Giver
By Byron Pulsifer
So many emotions and so many thoughts of being helpless come to our mind. If you know of someone who is dying, or who is seriously ill, our hearts always seem to rest squarely on that person. For those who are concerned about this seriously ill or dying person, we usually want to help, but can't. We are not miracle workers; we are not able to heal them no matter what we may think of doing or wanting to do. But, in all our concern shown towards this person there may be someone else who desperately needs our help but seems to be far away in the shadows of our minds.

The person, who we can help, however, is the care giver especially if this person is the primary person extending at home care. Day in and day out, they are constantly vicariously living with their loved ones pain and anguish. The ups and downs that seem to come and go as if in a blur are there continuously. There is no way to escape the pain, the sorrow, the incessant question of being able to cope after their loved one has died. So, what can you do?

Frequently, the care giver needs to know there is someone there who they can talk to, to confide their inner emotions, their own anguish, and their feelings of deeper and deeper entrapment in a spiraling course of disease that they cannot alter. The endless trips to the doctor, medical tests that seem to be repeated endlessly, the attempts to control pain or the progression of the disease, or the 24/7 knowledge that their life will be forever changed with the death of their loved one, is their constant diet.

If you are unable to visit because of distance, you can call the care giver on the phone every week. Of course, you'll want to know how their loved one is, but you also want to know how the care giver is coping. This is the time when you want to develop your listening skills. Often, a good listener is more valuable than a great conversationalist. You want the care giver to feel free, to open up, and to spill their emotions out to you. And, your role is not to offer trite "I know they will get better soon' meaningless phrases.

To continue reading this article Click on thie link below,
http://ezinearticles.com/?Caring-About-A-Care-Giver&id=1080425

For more assistance with an aging loved one in your life visit our website at http://www.family-caregivers.com/.

Recognizing Symptoms of Dementia in Allentown, PA

Here is a helpful article that I found and wanted to pass along to you. For more assistance with an aging loved one in your life visit our website at http://www.family-caregivers.com.

The Brown family reunion has always been an event everyone looks forward to. Family visits, games, stories and everyone’s favorite foods are always on the agenda. On the top of the menu is Grandmas Lemon Coconut Cake. Grandma always makes the traditional cake from her old family recipe. This year, however, the cake tasted a little on the salty side, perhaps a half cup full of salty.

Though the family was disappointed over the cake, of more concern was Grandma’s confusion with the recipe and her similar confusion about the loved ones around her. Could something be wrong with grandma's mental state?

One might say that for an elder person a little forgetfulness or confusion is normal, but when do you know if there is a serious problem, such as dementia?

An online article from FamilyDoctor.org outlines some common symptoms in recognizing dementia.
"Dementia causes many problems for the person who has it and for the person's family. Many of the problems are caused by memory loss. Some common symptoms of dementia are listed below. Not everyone who has dementia will experience all of these symptoms.

Recent memory loss. All of us forget things for a while and then remember them later. People who have dementia often forget things, but they never remember them. They might ask you the same question over and over, each time forgetting that you've already given them the answer. They won't even remember that they already asked the question.
Difficulty performing familiar tasks. People who have dementia might cook a meal but forget to serve it. They might even forget that they cooked it. Problems with language. People who have dementia may forget simple words or use the wrong words. This makes it hard to understand what they want.
Time and place disorientation. People who have dementia may get lost on their own street. They may forget how they got to a certain place and how to get back home. Poor judgment. Even a person who doesn't have dementia might get distracted. But people who have dementia can forget simple things, like forgetting to put on a coat before going out in cold weather.
Problems with abstract thinking. Anybody might have trouble balancing a checkbook, but people who have dementia may forget what the numbers are and what has to be done with them.
Misplacing things. People who have dementia may put things in the wrong places. They might put an iron in the freezer or a wristwatch in the sugar bowl. Then they can't find these things later.
Changes in mood. Everyone is moody at times, but people who have dementia may have fast mood swings, going from calm to tears to anger in a few minutes. Personality changes. People who have dementia may have drastic changes in personality. They might become irritable, suspicious or fearful.
Loss of initiative. People who have dementia may become passive. They might not want to go places or see other people."

Dementia is caused by change or destruction of brain cells. Often this change is a result of small strokes or blockage of blood cells, severe hypothyroidism or Alzheimer’s disease. There is a continuous decline in ability to perform normal daily activities. Personal care including dressing, bathing, preparing meals and even eating a meal eventually becomes impossible.

What can family members do if they suspect dementia? An appointment with the doctor or geriatric clinic is the first step to take. Depending on the cause and severity of the problem there are some medications that may help slow the process. Your doctor may recommend a care facility that specializes in dementia and Alzheimer’s. These facilities offer a variety of care options from day care with stimulating activities to part or full-time live-in options. Sometimes if patients tend to wander off, a locked facility is needed.

In the beginning family members find part time caregivers for their loved one. At first, loved ones need only a little help with remembering to do daily activities or prepare meals. As dementia progresses, caregiving demands often progress to 24 hour care. Night and day become confused and normal routines of sleeping, eating and functioning become more difficult for the patient. The demented person feels frustrated and may lash out in anger or fear. It is not uncommon for a child or spouse giving the care to quickly become overwhelmed and discouraged.

Family gatherings provide an excellent opportunity to discuss caregiving plans and whole family support. It is most helpful if everyone in the family is united in supporting a family caregiver in some meaningful way.
"The first step to holding a family meeting, and perhaps the most difficult one, is to get all interested persons together in one place at one time. If it's a family gathering, perhaps a birthday, an anniversary or another special event could be used as a way to get all to meet. Or maybe even a special dinner might be an incentive.

The end of the meeting should consist of asking everyone present to make his or her commitment to support the plan. This might just simply be moral support and agreement to abide by the provisions or it is hoped that those attending will volunteer to do something constructive. This might mean commitments to providing care, transportation, financial support, making legal arrangements or some other tangible support." The Four Steps of Long Term Care Planning

Professional home care services are an option to help families in the home. These providers are trained and skilled to help with dementia patients. Don’t forget care facilities as well. It may be the best loving care a family member can give is to place their loved one in a facility where that person is safely monitored and cared for.

The National Care Planning Council supports caregiving services throughout the country.www.longtermcarelink.net